Lets face it, relationships can be hard!
It doesn’t matter what dynamic the relationship is- whether its your boss, your children, spouse or parents, relationships can often be some of the most stressful and painful issues we face.
One of the main reasons that we struggle here is communication and trust. Not being heard, not hearing the other person without reacting, suppressing our feelings, not feeling safe, lashing out…it can all cause us tremendous pain and lead us to the point where we “Armor up” and shut down. This ‘armor’ might have served us well in other relationships but now just gets in the way.
I don’t think we set out to have bad relations with each other. I think that most people want to get along and just live in peace. So how does it go so bad?
There can be a lot of different reasons why people don’t have successful relationships. Life stresses, boundaries, addictions, not getting your needs met, past hurts, or even having expectations for someone that are either to high to achieve or perhaps unknown by the other person. Every person is different, and every situation comes with its own unique angles and issues.
I usually find that people that have a chance to be heard and can do it in a safe place can find ways to heal the past and rebuild the trust going forward. They just need some tools to help them.
Some of the things I help teach are:
- Boundaries – learning where you stop and they begin, and how to effectively communicate that
- Co Dependency – Relationship addiction. Unhealthy relationships and views of ourselves
- Basic needs – There are basic needs in relationship. Not wants – needs! What are they?
- Communications – Being heard, hearing others, empathy and owning our own feelings, emotions and behaviors.
- Self esteem and self worth – How I see myself and how I think others see me.
- Letting go of the past hurts – Forgiving yourself and possibly others and moving past the hurts
Sometimes having a third party talk with you and help to gain tools and perspectives is all you need to get your relationships and hearts back online. Relationship counselling can offer you a number of different ways to get answers and peace.
For couples counselling I offer a 5 session package that covers a lot of communication, and perspective exercises. It has been very successful. As well, I also do a number of programs for one on one in regards to gaining tools for self esteem, trust, worth, boundaries and self empowerment.
You can start having healthier relationships today!
Maple Ridge relationship counselling and Surrey relationship counselling
Call Ken : 778 846 3569